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Hey Reader,

​Sarah Hester Ross and Elyse Myers popularized the phrase “If I’m too much, go find less.” And while I’ve appreciated the phrase, I’ve never particularly identified with it.

I’ve never considered myself to have a big personality. Growing up, I was “smart but quiet” and therefore “a joy to have in class.” ← Direct quotes from grade-school report cards.

I did get called a know-it-all around third grade, but instead of leaning in and owning it like Hermione Granger, I learned to just not volunteer my knowledge unless I was asked.

Eventually, I turned into a high schooler who wasn’t popular, just friendly with everyone, and had very few actual friends.

Apparently, what I had internalized as a kid was that if I stayed quiet and small, nobody would dislike me.

I started back to school last week to pursue a bachelor's degree. And for the first time ever, I found myself actively editing to be “less” when I posted my introduction to the online classroom.

I felt like my first draft was too in-depth, too enthusiastic, too teacher’s pet vibes. And I realized that this wasn’t new…just my noticing it was.

I’ve spent a lot of time this last week reflecting on this new information and the puzzle pieces have started coming together.

A couple years ago I realized I didn’t have much I was passionate about. The majority of my skills had come from happenstance or circumstance, not intentional pursuit. I’d always just done whatever was in front of me, followed whatever path I found.

Even as a kid, I never had specific interests, favorites, hobbies, anything. I flitted from thing to thing, playing different sports, showing different animals in 4-H, picking up welding, gardening, piano, whatever I was pointed to.

Overall, it’s made me someone people find both interesting and baffling because I have tons of experiences and lots of knowledge over a very, very wide array of topics.

But while I realized this awhile ago, I just chalked it up to childhood trauma and never really tried to unravel the why behind it.

Of course now it clicks:

Passion and enthusiasm aren’t small and quiet.

For the record, I rewrote that class’s intro post back to my original version before submitting it. I committed to not watering myself down, especially the way I write. I’ve spent a lot of time cultivating my voice here, and I don’t have to stay in this safe-space I’ve created to use it.

And I’m continuing to embrace the things that I have finally allowed myself to become passionate about, and maybe I’ll stop feeling the need to stay quiet and contained in those passions.

After all, I said I’d never go back to school unless I knew for sure that what I was going back for was something I truly felt strongly about. And now I’m pursuing both an undergraduate degree and an outside guild membership, both in topics I can honestly say I’m feeling quite passionate and enthusiastic about.

All of that to say, it’s okay to still be discovering your passions and learning about yourself. And maybe you have an area where you’ve subconsciously been making yourself small and quiet where there’s no longer a need for it, and it’s time to let that go.

Now, onto some announcements, free resources, and fun little tidbits…

The Neurodiverse Entrepreneur Summit A free 4-day event to help you toss out the "rules" and build your online business to work for YOUR unique brain ✨ Learn More

Just Ask Dani For just $13/month, you get to ask me a weekly question and receive a personalized response. You also get access to the full library archive of Q&As from other members. Learn More

The Neurodivergent Entrepreneurship Workshop In this FREE 45-minute workshop, I cover 6 ways I’ve adapted my business to work for my neurodivergency and chronic illness, and how you can apply them to your business as well. Access Now

The Neurodivergent Entrepreneur Toolkit Most of the tools I share in this guide directly apply to how we can work with our neurodivergent brains and executive dysfunction instead of fighting against ourselves or trying to “fix” things. Grab the Toolkit for $25

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